It appears that Nintendo President Satoru Iwata fears the same fate for the Wii U. Nintendo played a risky card releasing the first next-generation system a solid year before the competitors. Now Iwata and company are seeing the first tip of the iceberg with the recent PlayStation 4 announcements. Sony is going Hi-Def, with super rich graphics, a dark, gritty realism and immersive connectiveness. As seen below, it appears that these specs, along with the information rumbling about the upcoming "Durango," Microsoft's take on next-gen, has put a worry in Nintendo, causing a sudden surge in development productivity. Iwata held a conference yesterday to make the following announcement:
"We have enjoyed the productive launch window of the Wii U," Iwata says. "We feel that the Wii U has truly prepared us for the next generation of game play. That's why today we are announcing the Wii Tuu, Nintendo's true next-generation platform. Fashioned after all that today's gamers want, we will be offering hi-definition, super-rich graphics, more mature content, and traditional gameplay controls.
"The Wii Tuu will expand on the Wii U experience. Seeing the importance of traditional controls to the hardcore gamer, the Pro Controller will become the default controller of the Tuu, and our tablet controller will be utilized primarily as a bonus screen with additional information.
"Many have touted the Wii U as barely performing better than our current competitors, so we have decided to improve by mimicking every single alleged rumor of their gaming specifications to ensure that we compete in the next generation. By doing this, we can ensure all third-party ports will be welcome on our system, with little to no development worries in porting to our traditional control schemes.
"With the Wii Tuu's graphical power set, we will be able to attack the other front that our competitors currently hold: the core gamer market. We feel that it's about time our games grew up, so Mario will be heading into a full-on First-Person Shooter against Bowser and his minions. This will be Mario's first M-Rated game in the entire company history. The graphical overhaul will also allow us to finally realize all those tech demos of Zelda we have shown you over the years. Why, we even feel that an upgraded Final Fantasy 7 could run on our new software! We are currently touching base with Squaresoft to see if that title could potentially land in our Christmas 2013 launch window. We'll get back to you once we know.
"Worry not, Wii U owners. Just as we gave dedicated Nintendo lovers a break if they adopted the 3DS early, we will give you a break as well. All of your Wii U devices (including your tablet controller) will port over to the Wii Tuu. We'll also give you a digital copy of all those games you got for the 3DS (though they'll only be playable on the tablet--we are still working on that one).
"Last but not least is the return of the Vitality Sensor....we really don't know what we are going to do with it this time, but it's been sitting around for a while, so we thought we'd bring the buzz back. Oh, and something to compete with all that online stuff.....maybe we can even figure out a way for the vitality sensor to help with online stuff! VITALITY SENSOR!!!
"Overall, Nintendo has seen some rough spots lately as we try to innovate, but it sure looks by the numbers that most gamers just want to blow $#!* up with a generic Marine dude, so who are we to keep them from those desires? When all those other systems are saying they have what it takes to compete in the next generation, we at Nintendo are ready to say 'Wii Tuu!!!!'"
With that, Iwata ran off stage, cackling and blabbing on about systems "printing money" or something, so he was unavailable for questions. We at GooferNation will work day and night to ensure that any new information on this subject gets to our readers as soon as possible!